Day 9

This is how my day started. I was getting ready to go to school. I had planned to meet up with toga winner girl (see day 7 blog) .We were going to go around in the morning try to get students to vote for our school. But toga girl had gotten sick that morning. While I was getting ready boyfriend had text-ed me asking how Teacup was doing. Teacup was one of the male kittens that was smaller then the others. They were born the day after my birthday which had made them 6 weeks exactly yesterday. I would call him sitter because he would sit and not play fight with the other kittens.  That's when we new something wasn't right. He was the smallest out of the litter and when we brought food out the other kittens devoured it while he just sat back and watched. I gave him some meat and he ate that fast.So I had assumed he was fine and just didn't like the cat food. I brought them all back to the barn.
So when my boyfriend text-ed me I went out immediately to see if he was okay. He wasn't . I brought him in and put some lamps on to warm him up. I bought kitten formula and fed him through what looked like a needle but wasn't. All morning I heard everyone say he wasn't going to make it. I hated it.  I don't like hearing that. I try to stay positive.  It was so sad to see him like he was. He wouldn't even stand up. I couldn't touch him. No one else had the time to try and save it so there went me trying to study. I tried but couldn't concentrate. It got to the point where I just couldn't handle it anymore. My mom kept an eye on him while she watched the stand from her rocking chair while I went up stairs. I'm going to shower and relax. I cried. It was such an awful day that I did. Tomorrow I'll be over it and that's usually how I am about death, I cry it all out. Talk about that thing who died. All the good things and then say shit happens and move on. It does though when you think about it. Everything happens for a reason and it made sense that he wasn't going to live. I saw it coming but a part of me feels like my mom didn't put the effort in to save him. I couldn't touch it though. I put on gloves. I just couldn't it was just to much for me. So yes if I didn't say it yet Teacup did die.

I now sit with one of the others. It just sucks because he or she looks just like Tea cup. They all do. 5 black kittens Midnight ( the mom) had.

I'll miss you tea cup. <3

This is not how I had planned my day, and that's what sucks about life. Well I guess depending how you look at it. You never know what your day will bring. It could be awful or great. So now I'm going to take a shower, clear my mind and get back to studying.